Sad, Sad Day

I know it's been a long time since I posted. Pansy was doing well. The tumors weren't getting bigger, really. SHe had a lot of small bumps, but nothing that seemed threatening. Last week, when we took her to the Cat Hospital, Adrienne noticed that her breathing was a little labored. Sunday, it got worse.
We took her to the vet today, as usual. Dr K took xrays that showed her cancer had spread to her lungs. P hardly had any room to breathe. She had also started to build up fluid around her lungs. It was so bad that it was only going to be a matter of time (and a short matter, at that) before Sweet P had a crisis and was in a lot of pain.
So, we opted to end on a high note--before she really experienced any pain.
As we sat around the back of TCH, I was remembering my first adoption event, when Adrienne climbed into the crate to love on Pansy. And, when I picked P up from her adopter's house. And all those nights of being smothered in my sleep.
It's hard, you know? To be here without her. Ginger was upstairs, sitting in Pansy's room, waiting for me to feed Pansy. She was looking around, confused because P wasn't there, and Linz and I were both home, so why wasn't Miss P? I don't have to go upstairs to feed her. We don't need the dasaquin or the cosoquin. I don't need the fat cat ball. It was really hard to come home without her. with that empty carrier in the back seat. without her hair, her purr, without playing her favorite song.
Anyway, I have a lot of videos and pictures that I meant to post. I may go through and back-post them. We'll see. I don't know if anyone is really reading this, but I wanted to post the sad news, just in case.

Oh, and she weighed 14.4 lbs this morning.